CELEBRITY DEATHMATCH!

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CELEBRITY DEATHMATCH!

Postby brandon1107 » Sun Apr 12, 2009 11:38 am

Rules: I will pick two celebrities to fight each other. The next poster will pick who wins and HOW he/she wins and then picks two more celebrities.

EXAMPLES
Post1: Mike Tyson vs. Michael Jordan
Post2: Michael Jordan would rip off his head and throw it into a basket
The Burger King vs. Ronald McDonald
Post3: The Burger King would shove a poison Whopper down Ronald's throat
George Bush vs. John McCain...

...and so on...

So I'll start, Ben Stiller vs. Owen Wilson
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Re: CELEBRITY DEATHMATCH!

Postby Scutch-Nukem » Sun Apr 12, 2009 1:12 pm

Owen Wilson will tear off Ben Stiller's big ears and let him bleed to death.

Hamburglar vs. Whatahero (old Whataburger mascot)
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Re: CELEBRITY DEATHMATCH!

Postby KTownEgghead » Sun Apr 12, 2009 1:54 pm

Hamburgler would slam his fat ass on the Whataburger dude.

Hayley Williams -vs- Avril Lavigne
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Re: CELEBRITY DEATHMATCH!

Postby Electro Tomato » Sun Apr 12, 2009 2:04 pm

Avril Lavigne will brutally murder Hayley in the style of the following cannibal corpse song:

Spoiler:There is something inside me
It's coming out
I feel like killing you
Let loose of the anger, held back too long
My blood runs cold
Through my anatomy, dwells another being
Rooted in my cortex, a servant to its bidding
Brutality becomes my appetite
Violence is now a way of life
The sledge my tool to torture
As it pounds down on your forehead
Eyes bulging from the sockets
With every swing of my mallet
I smash your **** head in, until brains seep in
Through the crack
Blood does leak distorted beauty,
Catastrophe steaming slop.
Splattered all over me
Lifeless body, slouching dead
Lecherous abcess.
Where you once had a head
Avoiding the prophecy of
My new found lust
You will never live again,
Soon your life will end
I'll see you die at my feet, eternally I smash your face
Facial bones collapse as I crack your skull in half
Crushing, cranal, contents
Draining the snot, I rip out the eyes
Squeezing them in my hands nerves are incised
Peeling the flesh off the bottom of my weapon
Involuntarily pulpifying facil region
Suffer, and then you die
Torture, pulverised
At one with my sixth sense, I feel free
To kill as I please, No one can stop me
Created to kill, the carnage continues
Violently reshaping human facial tissue
Brutality becomes my appetite
Violence is now the way of life
The sledge my tool to torture
As it pounds down on your forehead



Charmin Baby v.s. Leatherface
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Re: CELEBRITY DEATHMATCH!

Postby Scutch-Nukem » Sun Apr 12, 2009 5:01 pm

Charmin Baby will offer Leatherface some Charmin, resulting in a friendship. (Mortal Kombat ftw)

Cool Spot (old 7-UP mascot) vs. The Hawaiian Punch Mascot.
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Re: CELEBRITY DEATHMATCH!

Postby 1337buddha » Sun Apr 12, 2009 5:06 pm

Charmin Baby would throw toilet paper at Leatherface, causing him to explode.

Don King v.s. Mike Tyson
There is no need to be upset.

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Re: CELEBRITY DEATHMATCH!

Postby Yooble » Sun Apr 12, 2009 5:41 pm

Mike Tyson would win by deafening Don King with his squeaky voice

Jimi Hendrix vs Eddie Van Halen
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Re: CELEBRITY DEATHMATCH!

Postby Scutch-Nukem » Sun Apr 12, 2009 5:42 pm

1337buddha wrote:Charmin Baby would throw toilet paper at Leatherface, causing him to explode.

Don King v.s. Mike Tyson


How in the hell could you miss MY post which was a good 5 minutes before yours?
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Re: CELEBRITY DEATHMATCH!

Postby estemshorn » Sun Apr 12, 2009 6:22 pm

Jimi Hendrix, because he lights his guitar on fire and then throws it at eddie..


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Re: CELEBRITY DEATHMATCH!

Postby Spikehead777 » Sun Apr 12, 2009 7:44 pm

Cool Spot (old 7-UP mascot) vs. The Hawaiian Punch Mascot.
The Hawaiian Punch Mascot will drown the Cool Spot mascot in the oceans of Hawaii.

Oprah Vs. Dr. Phil
Oprah's v..... will shoot Dr. Phil to death. (South Park FTW).

Martha Stewart vs. Michael Jackson.

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Re: CELEBRITY DEATHMATCH!

Postby 1337buddha » Sun Apr 12, 2009 11:09 pm

Scutch-Nukem wrote:How in the hell could you miss MY post which was a good 5 minutes before yours?


i guess i was in the middle of typing this and doing other stuff. :sleep:
There is no need to be upset.

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Re: CELEBRITY DEATHMATCH!

Postby KTownEgghead » Mon Apr 13, 2009 8:52 am

Martha Stewart knits a blanket and wraps MJ in it, after she throws him into a river.

Chuck Norris -vs- Jesus
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Re: CELEBRITY DEATHMATCH!

Postby bowstar » Mon Apr 13, 2009 9:22 am

I thought Chuck Norris was Jesus??
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Re: CELEBRITY DEATHMATCH!

Postby brandon1107 » Mon Apr 13, 2009 9:39 am

bowstar wrote:I thought Chuck Norris was Jesus??



Then Chuck Norris is fighting himself which therefore causes a second dimension to explode and it ends all of life as we know it. (Chuck Norris won)


Jimi Hendrix vs. Eric Clapton
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Re: CELEBRITY DEATHMATCH!

Postby KTownEgghead » Mon Apr 13, 2009 10:22 am

Obvious. Jimi sets his guitar on fire and stabs Eric through the heart with it.

Santa Claus -vs- The Easter Bunny
I find comfort in this mess of things;
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